Google Search History

The Little Englishman recently cleared my phone because it was saying I had low storage. My phone does this on a regular basis, pretty much every time it updates itself. Anyway, this has allowed me to see exactly what I've searched in the last 24 hours, to my own amusement. Here's the list:

dream interpretation
liam neeson only person to look less bad ass
yeast infection crease leg*
yeast**
milk soap food coloring experiment

*This is the one I forgot I did and then snort laughed for three minutes after re-reading it. It's an affliction only one person in my household currently has and it's not me.
** Can anyone do a summary for me as to house yeast it "harvested"? I can't sit down and read that wiki article. There was no real answer that I could come by when skimming.

I was looking up the milk soap food coloring experiment after I made the standard non-newtonian fluid every middle schooler has ever played with: cornstarch and water. Apparently England hates their children so the Little Englishman has never had this experience. As for the milk experiment, it's pretty much summed up in this video here:

Anyway, dream interpretation was just on a whim. It's pseudoscience to me but the Little Englishman's mum is a therapist and utilizes it so I thought I'd check it out. I've been having a reoccurring theme in dreams of a room in my house being completely forgotten. I'll come back to it and for some reason it will be infested with dead and living animals as well as teeming with general decay. In the first, I was visiting my old room in Freeport and remembered the hamster collection I kept in the wall. I've never owned a hamster in my life but in the dream there was a corner of a wall that had a built in, multi-storied hamster cage. It was unkempt yet there were still living hamsters in it. My mom was still feeding them but had neglected to dispose of the many hamster carcasses that lined the floor or change the bedding which was littered with rotting waste. I was mortified.

The second dream involved the Little Englishman and I living in a one story house with an expansive floor plan though we only had one tiny little bathroom. We'd lived there for quite some time but had never entered one room in it because the landlord said the previous tenants had never cleaned it out and apparently neither he nor we had bothered to do anything about it. That information completely slipped my mind one day and I went into this room. It was about 15 by 15 feet and had to massive vanities the size of a regular kitchen table. There were lights built into the tops of the walls creating very muted lighting but everything was beige and off-white. There was a spot light over this massive jacuzzi/shower with shelves made out of marbled glass along two sides of it and a long, white linen shower curtain. The whole room was carpeted except for a patch of beige ceramic tile alongside the jacuzzi. It was beautiful as long as you disregarded the mold, moss and algae that covered most of the jacuzzi, up the shower curtain and spreading out in patches across the carpet. I yelled for the Little Englishman to come look and then noticed the hoards of both dead and living frogs and other amphibians. I was startled and turned for the door but slipped. A frog the size of my head with a completely yellow body except two large red spots on its back made a break for the door and I started screaming for the Little Englishman.

I know I've had more like this but I can remember them. It's got to mean something to my subconscious but it doesn't have any sort of readily available explanation.

Fifty Shades of Shit #1: Taxes are hard

Dear E. L. James:
Why is it so hard for Anastasia Steele (ugh) to understand why the seemingly awful Christian Grey would give to charity? As a college student myself and someone who has held a job, like your main character has, I've had to pay taxes. There is a section where you list tax deductible donations and the Little Englishman has informed me that it is the same in England, where you are from. It is also fairly common for people of great means to give to charity. Some may do it because they honestly support a charity or as a thinly veiled attempt to garner more fame from the public. When a CEO who clearly love power and money and is a terrible person does it, it is purely for the tax write-off. They are able to retain more of their income this way because they receive it all back. Anastasia Steele (ugh) would know these basic facts as she's paid taxes as in college...at least one would hope. I haven't read much past this part and I'm sure that this is meant to be some way of showing the "human," in Christian Grey but you've gone about it in a silly way.

Pure Boredom

All right, so if anyone still reads this blog, they'll realize that I post infrequently. This is due to a precise set of circumstances:
1. Sleep Deprivation: Hate to bring this up again but I'm on Adderall. It's become deeply ingrained in my day-to-day life, especially when it comes to sleeping habits. College students who have taken it to cram for a test know exactly what I mean. I sleep semi-normally most nights but every once in a while my legal speed decides I should stay up all night and do nothing productive. I then proceed to take more Adderall at about 6am in order to continue through the next day like I had sleep. Mostly it just makes me antsy.
2. The Little Englishman is asleep: He's not very good at pulling all-nighters but always tries to come along for the ride when I do. He lasts until I pop a perk-me-up pill and then slumps himself into the bed. He is currently unconscious after another attempt. I just jostled him quite vigorously and shouted his name. No response whatsoever. Yet, if I play a youtube video as quiet as I can still hear, he will instantly wake up and tell me to turn it off.
3. Inspiration: For one, I have to remember this god damn blog exists which is an issue in itself as I can't even remember my sisters' birthdays (they both happen in "J," months which just fucks me up to no end and you can forget about the day.) Then, I have to have watched or read something that is amazingly creative. Usually it's a book I'm reading or some random awesome thing on StumbleUpon. This time it wasn't so much a creative thing as it was horrifying Youtube video. Also, the knowledge that no one reads facebook notes, even if they are tagged in it, makes me seek the comfort of a wider audience despite my lack of commenters. Really, it's just to put my thoughts into coherent sentences that I badger the Little Englishman into reading later. He's a big fan.
4. Utter Boredom: The Little Englishman is asleep. I'm no longer entertained by the endless drivelling of vloggers. Well not endless or drivelling, just kind of tired by the 100th video I've watched today. Modern Warfare 3 has frustrated me to the point of rage quitting. Sudoku is beyond my mental capacity. Playing fetch with Dexter is no longer amusing or cute, just painful because she doesn't realize I'm going to throw the toy again and am not stealing it. George R.R. Martin has described too many tunics, banners and breasts for me to be enthralled. We cancelled Hulu Plus and Netflix. College is out.....

LET'S BLOG!